


or should i walk by again

by smallredboy



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Autistic Aaron Burr, Bisexual Aaron Burr, Co-workers, Gay Hercules Mulligan, Kissing, M/M, Middle School, Not Beta Read, Time Skips, Trans Aaron Burr, Trans Hercules Mulligan, i somehow forgot that tag, this is self indulgent garbage and i love it!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-18 17:39:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14857202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smallredboy/pseuds/smallredboy
Summary: Herc and Aaron met each other in middle school - and they met each other again, twelve years later.





	or should i walk by again

**Author's Note:**

> a prompt fill for tumblr; it also fills the 'when we were young: nostalgia' square on my gen prompt bingo. the title is from 'love at first sight' by the brobecks. i loved writing this a lot.
> 
> enjoy!

They kissed for the first time during middle school.   
  
Herc was beautiful back then — curls shaped his soft face, and he was prone to laughter and gossip. He was prone to being friends with the girls, talking about cute boys and no one noticed how awkward he was around the people they thought were the same as him.    
  
Aaron had taken the brunt of puberty full force back then. Pimples decorated his face, and his chest had grown enough to be mistaken for a sixteen-year-old worthy to be catcalled. Hell, even cutting most of his hair off on impulse didn't' fix the comments. He was awkward and moody and angry, and when he looks back he can’t help but grimace in embarrassment.   
  
They were having a sleepover — Aaron read books to Herc, repeating the parts he liked the most. He sang along to the music that played,  _ Another One Bites The Dust _ getting the most energetic singing from Aaron. He loved repeating phrases, wiggling as he listened to music. It made him happy.    
  
Herc told him he seemed autistic. His reply was that girls didn't have autism, so he was alright. He was wrong on both fronts (not being autistic and being a girl), but it was still something. Herc's older brother was autistic and he was hilarious— awkward just like Aaron, repeating words and phrases and flapping his hands whenever he got excited. He didn't talk much, but Aaron always found a way to communicate with him. Be it with post-it notes or head nods.    
  
Herc was listening intently as Aaron sang his heart out to  _ Backstreet's Back _ , smiling as he did so. Aaron turned to him, tilted his head and grinned.    
  
"How was that?" he asked as he changed the radio station, more rock-ish songs playing out.    
  
Herc laughed and looked away, making shapes in the sheets of the mattress he was going to sleep in. "Amazing as always," he nodded.    
  
It was Aaron's time to look away and be embarrassed. "Thank you," he said softly. He sat on Herc's mattress and turned the radio up, songs blasting out from it. He hummed contently and leaned against Herc.    
  
After a while of comfortable silence, Herc said something that wasn't his name. He looked up— Herc didn't say anything, shifting his weight on the mattress.   
  
“What is it?” Aaron asked after a few moments of silence.    
  
Herc looked away and fiddled with his hands. He was very nervous by the look of him, and it made Aaron's heart tug painfully and beautifully at the same time.    
  
Herc breathed the thing that wasn't Aaron's name once again. “I wanna kiss you,” he said finally.    
  
And Aaron turned up his nose. Because at the time he believed they were both girls — and girls only kissed boys, not each other. According to his grandfather, a priest, at least.    
  
But he liked Herc. He liked his soft smile and gossipy attitude (as much as he didn't share it) and he liked playing with Herc's hair. He liked him a lot. And hey, he hadn't kissed a boy yet; maybe the practice would help.    
  
"I don't see why not," he said after a few seconds of silence.    
  
Herc's eyes widened and he straightened up, moving towards Aaron and cupping his cheek with his hand. He smiled at him before pressing their lips together.    
  
Aaron didn't expect to feel the sparks light under his skin like fireworks. Or the pleasurable twist in his guts, or the pang in his heart. Once Herc pulled away, he kissed him again— just a tiny peck on the lips.    
  
Herc smiled wide and toothy, one of his teeth visibly chipped. Aaron cupped his face in his hands and smiled at him so wide he felt he could break his own face.    
  
"How'd you chip that tooth?" he asked before pressing another kiss into his lips. It felt natural, it felt normal, and the feelings spread around his body like wildfire at every little touch.    
  
Herc laced his fingers with his. "Well, back in fifth grade I got in an argument with a seventh grader. His name was Charles, I think." He turned up his nose but squeezed Aaron's hand. His heart skipped a beat.    
  
"Did you kick his ass?"   
  
Herc nodded. "You know I was raised with no sisters, I had to learn how to fight!"   
  
Aaron laughed heartily. "An eleven-year-old girl kicks seventh grader ass." Herc huffed a little at being called a girl— Aaron didn't notice. "You're amazing."   
  
"You're pretty amazing yourself," Herc told him, kissing his cheek. "You destroyed a sixteen-year-old at chess!"   
  
"Oh cmon, that's not that big of a deal," he said, face warming up. Herc kissed his cheek once again, and his whole body shook with something he couldn't name.    
  
"It was incredible. I don't know crap about chess, but the look on her face was glorious."   
  
Aaron shook his head and kissed him again. "Thank you too, ma'am."   
  
Herc tilted and shook his head, affection in his eyes. "You're beautiful."   
  
"Handsome," Aaron corrected without thinking twice.    
  
Herc pushed Aaron's bangs off his forehead. "You're very handsome." He said something that wasn't his name, and then said, "The handsomest."   
  
Aaron chuckled and leaned closer to him, kissing his cheek. "It's most handsome, but thank you."   
  
They fell asleep on the same mattress. When they were woken up by Herc's stepfather the next morning, no one questioned anything. 

* * *

Their second first kiss happens twelve years later. 

Aaron knows there's _something_ about his new coworker, but he can't quite put it in place. All he knows about him is that his name is Hercules Mulligan and that he's eerily similar to the girl he loved back in middle school. He's got the same surname, same eyes, the same nose, the same complexion, the same hair. But he's a guy, and he's ripped, and he's nothing like her at all.    
  
He invites him for dinner, and it's a quiet meal. They talk a little about work, giving each other hopeful glances as they finish their meals. The question of if the other is also into men hangs heavy on top of them— neither of them wants to burst the bubble.    
  
"I have three brothers," Herc tells him. "They're all great. I'm the youngest child."   
  
"I have a sister," Aaron tells him. Herc gulps, for a reason he can't pinpoint just yet. "She's older than me. I don't know what's going on with her." Sarah and him haven't talked much ever since she left their grandfather's house. For as much as he knows, she isn't aware of him being a guy. The thought makes his skin itch.   
  
"That's nice. You've got any ex stories? Because, my ex boyfriend..." he starts, and Aaron sighs with an indescribable emotion. He's into men too, thank God. When he finishes his story, he laughs and nods.    
  
"I don't have much. Finding yourself a messy ex is hard when you're trans." He hopes he's not the type of cis man into men to be transphobic.    
  
Herc looks at him. "I'm trans too," he says.    
  
Aaron's eyes widen. Herc has the same amount of brothers as her; Herc is also Irish and black; Herc is from the same town as Aaron.    
  
"Were you once..." he says quietly, the thing that isn't Herc's name a mere whisper.    
  
Herc echoes by asking him if he's the thing that isn't his name.    
  
Aaron gets up from the dining table and pushes Herc towards the wall. He kisses him senseless— and fuck, he tastes so different yet the same. He presses closer to him, taking his lips in, remembering that girl and how honey-sweet she was.    
  
The kisses grow desperate and Aaron grins far and wide once he pulls away. Herc tangles a hand on his own curls and cusses a little. "Holy shit," he says softly.    
  
Aaron looks up at him and grins so wide he thinks he could break his own face. "Holy shit is right. Fuck, it's been twelve years and I still think about it sometimes."   
  
"We were so nonchalant about it," he says, pressing a kiss to the corner of Aaron's mouth. "Like, we were just twelve-year-olds fumbling around and kissing each other. It was amazing."   
  
He laughs, looks at Herc with adoration. "I noticed you were like yourself back then... physically, I mean. But I thought it couldn't be."   
  
"Because I'm too ripped to be her?" he teases.    
  
Aaron scoffs and looks away. "I mean, maybe. Kinda. You look smoking hot now."   
  
"Thank you, you too. It's the testosterone."   
  
Aaron laughs heartily and lovingly. "Oh, me too. Me too."   
  
Herc cups his cheek. "You're still a shorty, though."   
  
"Shut up."   
  
"You are!"   
  
"Shut up!" he insists.    
  
Herc laughs so pretty he thinks he could faint.    
  
They're there in silence for a few minutes, just looking at each other, wondering, wandering in their minds.    
  
"How's Hugh been?" Aaron asks as he pulls away from him, sitting on the couch. Herc pets his head and smiles.    
  
"He's been fine. Were my assumptions about you being autistic correct?"   
  
He nods and looks down at his hands. "Yeah, got diagnosed a few years after you left the city."   
  
Herc gulps and nods, kissing his temple. "I wish we hadn't lost contact."   
  
Aaron looks up at him; centers on his nose so he doesn't have to make eye contact. "Me too, Herc. But we're here now, and we've got plenty of time to make up for not being high school sweethearts."   
  
Herc laughs, puts a hand on his hip. Aaron pulls away, shakes his head and simply lets their lips meet. Herc lets him, and once they pull away they just stare at each other. Then Aaron pulls away, looks down again.    
  
"I liked you a lot," Herc says. "After I realized I'm trans my crush on you made me unsure about being gay. But I decided it was in the past." He laughs and shakes his head at the thought. "Turns out you were a guy all along."   
  
"I'm bi," he says, leaning against Herc and letting his head rest on his shoulder. "With a big preference for girls, though. You're an outlier."   
  
"I'm an outlier," Herc echoes, shaking his head and laughing.    
  
Aaron can't help but laugh along. Maybe their lives were simpler twelve years ago, but now they know who they are, and they've found each other again.    
  
He wouldn't trade that for anything else. 


End file.
